"The Bed of Nails" is the nineteenth episode of the BBC comedy series Yes Minister, first broadcast 9 December 1982, in which Jim Hacker unwisely accepts the role of 'Transport Supremo' with a view to developing an 'Integrated Transport' policy for the UK. It soon becomes apparent that opposition from various transport interests, the unions and significant also from within the Department for Transport will make implementation impossible and the policy is promptly ditched following a number of carefully calculated 'leaks'.

The episode has been credited with introducing the phrase 'Integrated Transport', which is now widely used within UK transport policy circles and also for describing with some accuracy the dynamics operating within the Department for Transport.

The Prime Minister's special advisor, Sir Mark Spencer, meets with the Cabinet Secretary, Sir Arnold Robinson, in 10 Downing Street. The Prime Minister wants an Integrated Transport Policy, the implementation of which would be a political minefield. It would be popular with the public but an overall vote loser for whoever attempted to implement it. The role had already been declined by the Secretary of State for Transport and in addition, the civil service did not want it to succeed. They therefore propose to create "lots of activity but no actual achievement" and conclude that Jim Hacker is the person to achieve this for them.

Recognising that Hacker's Permanent Secretary, Sir Humphrey Appleby would advise against him accepting the role they bring Hacker in and flatter him with a new title 'Transport Supremo', describing the post as 'an honour' and highlighting all the positive aspects. They outline the PMs aspirations for rationalisation of the road and railway networks to avoid duplication, for a new link should be created between Heathrow airport and the West Coast Main Line, better coordination between the railways and bus services with a single ticket that can be used on both mainline rail and the London Underground and also for combined bus and railway timetables to be published with bus time available within railway stations. They decline to mention any of the problems and pressure him to agree immediately which he does.

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