All the Queen's Men

All the Queen's Men
Directed by	Stefan Ruzowitzky
Produced by	Rainer Virnich Phil Alden Robinson
Written by	David Schneider
Starring	Matt LeBlanc Eddie Izzard James Cosmo Karl Markovics
Music by	Uwe Fahrenkrog-Petersen Robert Folk Michael Lloyd
Cinematography	Peter Kappel Wedigo von Schultzendorff
Edited by	Rudi Heinen Nick Moore Britta Nahler Andrea Schumacher
Production company	Streamline
Distributed by	Strand Releasing
Release date	October 14, 2001 (U.S. Mill Valley Film Festival) October 25, 2002 (limited) December 13, 2001 (Germany) June 7, 2002 (Austria)
Running time	100 min.
Country	Germany / Austria
Language	English
Budget	$15 million
Box office	$23,662

All the Queen's Men is a 2001 action comedy war film. It was directed by Stefan Ruzowitzky and stars Matt LeBlanc and Eddie Izzard. Made on a budget of $15mn, the film earned only $23,662 in the United States, yielding an approximate -99.92% return.

During World War II the British army is attempting to retrieve an Enigma machine from Germany. Having failed in previous attempts they decide to send four men undercover to the factory that makes the devices, deep in Berlin. Unfortunately the factory is populated entirely by women, and they only have men to send. American O'Rourke (LeBlanc), British transvestite Tony Parker (Izzard), genius Johnno (David Birkin) and the reluctant Archie (James Cosmo) are sent to infiltrate the factory dressed as women.

Dropped in the wrong area, the team must first try to find their bearings. Aided by Romy, a sympathiser to their cause, they find their way to the factory. They manage to retrieve the Enigma machine, against the expectations of the British army. Just before they leave Germany, they realize they were tricked - the British government already had the device, but wanted to make the Germans think they were still after it. They were specifically chosen as the team most likely to fail. That they are about to successfully leave Germany with an Enigma machine would, in fact, destroy the usefulness of the machine, as the Germans would know it was stolen and switch to a different code system. Archie volunteers to be captured with the machine to allow the mission to "fail". After he is captured, the team retrieves him and returns safely to England, leaving the Germans with the impression they have all the Enigma machines and the British are still desperate to obtain one.

Roger Ebert mentioned the film in his book Your Movie Sucks, terming it "a perfectly good idea for a comedy, but it just plain doesn't work." Ebert also mentions the problem with the plot being about retrieving an Enigma machine when "Anyone who has seen Enigma, U-571, or the various TV documentaries...will be aware that by the time of the movie, the British already had possession of an Enigma machine... The movie has an answer to it, but it comes so late in the film that although it makes sense technically, the damage has already been done."