"I'm Like a Lawyer with the Way I'm Always Trying to Get You Off (Me & You)", or for short "I'm Like a Lawyer... (Me & You)" is a song by American rock band Fall Out Boy, and is the fifth and last single from their third studio album, Infinity on High (2007). With music composed by Fall Out Boy vocalist and guitarist Patrick Stump and lyrics penned by bassist Pete Wentz, the song was one of the two tracks produced by Babyface (who was referenced in the song), the other being single "Thnks fr th Mmrs".

This song was played on VH1's V-Spot acoustic sessions along with "Thnks fr th Mmrs", "This Ain't a Scene, It's an Arms Race", and "Sugar, We're Goin Down", all of which were successful singles. Wentz characterized Stump’s vocal performance on the song as "straight-up Motown", continuing to say "If there wasn't a rock band playing, it'd be straight R&B, and he'd go on tour with just an upright bass and a drum and open up for R. Kelly." Lyrically, the song has been described as "about as close to a love song as you'll get from this band, a rare moment of tenderness among songs about blog entries, guest lists, and therapy sessions.

In Australia, the single reached No. 28 on the Australian ARIA singles chart, becoming the fourth consecutive top 30 single from the album in that region. In the US it was much less successful and only managed to reach No. 68 on the Billboard Hot 100 but received moderate mainstream airplay.

All lyrics written by bassist Pete Wentz; all music composed by lead vocalist and guitarist Patrick Stump.

As the band collaborated with longtime R&B producer Babyface, initial reviews of the song and its breach into another genre were mixed. Corey Apar, a writer for Allmusic, was more malignant towards the song, calling it Maroon 5-ish, with "a vocal hook uncomfortably close to Phil Collins' cover of "A Groovy Kind of Love". On the contrary, Rolling Stone magazine lauded the song, and IGN approved of the song, assuring long-time fans that they indeed had nothing to fear about the band permanently branching into R&B.

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