Only the Good...

Only the Good... is the final episode in the eighth series and the original run of the British science fiction series Red Dwarf. It was first shown in the UK on 5 April 1999 in the 9:00 pm BBC2 time slot, and was written by Doug Naylor and directed by Ed Bye. The episode also marks the last appearance of human Rimmer as he appears as a hologram in the 2009 three-part special Back to Earth.

The episode begins with a few lines of text explaining that the starship Hermes has been destroyed by a synthetic, highly corrosive micro-organism. An escape pod from the ship carries a lone survivor, Talia Garrett. The pod and the woman are picked up by Red Dwarf, but it is revealed that the microbe has also been brought on board when part of the empty escape pod dissolves away.

Now some time into their prison sentence, the Dwarfers have been put on probation for good behaviour. Arnold Rimmer is attending to Captain Hollister as he recovers from Yellow Fever. Hollister notices that Rimmer has tried to slip in a form pardoning him from all crimes. Rimmer explains his ambition to become an officer someday, perhaps even a Captain. Hollister tells him he is not officer material and dismisses him as Talia enters. It seems that the Captain and Talia know each other from the past. Rimmer, disgusted at the Captain's success with women and his own failure in that regard, leaves. In the corridor he attempts to steal some chocolate from the vending machine, only for the AI of the machine to promise revenge. Rimmer tells the machine that the day that happens he'll be captain of the ship.

Meanwhile, back in The Tank, Kryten tells Lister that he is changing Miss Kochanski's calendar, as she had earlier complained to him that it was "The wrong time of the month". Lister realises what is going on and instructs Kryten secretly on how to behave. Kochanski returns to her cell and discovers Kryten has attempted to celebrate her period with a banner that reads 'Have A Fantastic Period' as well as giving her a gift-wrapped tampon and encouraging her to try it on and give it a twirl. Kochanski makes Kryten realise he's been tricked.