List of Two and a Half Men episodes

Two and a Half Men is a CBS sitcom that premiered on September 22, 2003. Almost every episode's title is a phrase said by one of the characters in that episode. The three exceptions are the pilot episode and the episodes "Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor" (Season 1) and "Frankenstein and the Horny Villagers" (Season 2). The latter episode does fit the criterion, but the quote was part of a deleted scene which Chuck Lorre explains in the episode's vanity card.

The episodes "Twenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without a Snootful" (Season 1), "Chocolate Diddlers or My Puppy's Dead" (Season 8), and "Who's Vod Kanockers?" (Season 4) are also not direct quotes. Charlie states, "I'm not going to face all those pre-pubers without a snoot-ful;" the number twenty-five is never mentioned. Charlie sings his song called "Chocolate Diddlers", while Alan suggests it sounds more like "My Puppy's Dead". The episode title is offering up a suggestion to which of the two titles the song could be called. Jake asks who "Vod Kanockers" is, but in a longer manner ("Who is this Vod Kanockers that you speak of?"). The episode title is a shorter version of what Jake asked. However, on the DVD release, the episode was titled "Who Is This Vod Kanockers?".

On March 13, 2014, Two and a Half Men was renewed for a 12th season, which was announced the following May as being its last season, that premiered on October 30, 2014. During the course of the series, 262 episodes of Two and a Half Men aired over 12 seasons.

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