Lesbian Vampire Killers
| Lesbian Vampire Killers | |
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| Directed by | Phil Claydon |
| Produced by | Steve Clark-Hall |
| Written by | Stewart Williams Paul Hupfield |
| Starring |
James Corden Mathew Horne MyAnna Buring Paul McGann Vera Filatova |
| Music by | Debbie Wiseman |
| Cinematography | David Higgs |
| Edited by | James Herbert |
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Production
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| Distributed by |
Momentum Pictures The Weinstein Company (USA) Paramount Pictures (Australia) |
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Release date
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Running time
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87 minutes |
| Country | United Kingdom |
| Language | English |
Lesbian Vampire Killers is a 2009 British comedy horror film written by Stewart Williams and Paul Hupfield, produced by Steve Clark-Hall and directed by Phil Claydon.
Jimmy (Mathew Horne) and Fletch (James Corden) are two friends living in London, experiencing life problems. Jimmy is dumped by his unscrupulous girlfriend, and Fletch is fired from his job as a clown for punching a child. They decide to escape their woes and hike to a remote village in Norfolk that they find on an old map. As they arrive at a pub in the village, with Jimmy upset about Fletch destroying his phone, they see a number of attractive foreign female history students leaving.
Hoping to find more beautiful women inside, they are greeted by a morose crowd of men and approached by a seemingly crazed vicar (Paul McGann) who believes Jimmy is a long lost descendant of a local vampire slayer. As the barman offers the two men free ale as an apology for the vicar, they learn the students they saw earlier are going to a cottage - where they are to stay the night. Jimmy and Fletch pursue the students' van, catching up to it as the engine has broken down, and are introduced to four girls (Heidi, Lotte, Anke and Trudi). They are invited to join a party on the bus.
The group arrives at their destination, only to learn that a curse rests over the village and that every female child turns into a lesbian vampire on her eighteenth birthday. There is an old legend stating that the Vampire Queen, Carmilla, descended on the village during the night of a blood moon, killed its menfolk and seduced its women to her evil. When the ruler of the land, Baron Wolfgang Mclaren (Jimmy's great ancestor) returned from the Crusades, he discovered one of the women corrupted by Carmilla was his wife, Eva. The baron forged a sacred sword, then defeated Carmilla, but before dying, Carmilla cursed the village, adding that when the blood of the last of Mclaren's bloodline mixed with a virgin girl's blood, Carmilla would be resurrected.
Fletch and Jimmy spend the night with the women. Heidi and Anke are turned into vampires. After Lotte insists that the others try to find her missing friends, they witness Trudi being turned. Eva, Carmilla's mistress, tries to draw Lotte to her growing clan of lesbian vampires. The trio runs back into the cottage after killing Heidi and Anke and barricade themselves in after the vampires destroy the van. Jimmy's ex-girlfriend Judi arrives at the door and Jimmy, not ready to give up on the relationship, takes her into the bedroom. Lotte reveals to Fletch that she is a virgin and wants to sleep with Jimmy.
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