"I'm Gonna Hire a Wino to Decorate Our Home" is a song written by Dewayne Blackwell and recorded by American country music artist David Frizzell. It was released in April 1982 as the first single from the album The Family's Fine, But This One's All Mine. "I'm Gonna Hire a Wino to Decorate Our Home" was David Frizzell's only number one on the country chart as a solo artist. The single went to number one for one week and spent a total of 14 weeks in country music's top 40.

The song also became an unexpected mainstream pop hit in Canada, peaking at No. 20 on the RPM Top Singles chart (in addition to peaking at No. 3 on the magazine's Top Country Tracks chart).

The song talks of a wife who grows tired of her husband's barhopping (and spending his entire paycheck doing so).

But instead of ending the marriage, she comes up with a unique plan – she decides to redecorate their house into a bar, and play the part of bartender/waitress as an inducement to get her husband to stay at home (and possibly bring his friends along with him, so they can spend their paychecks). While he recovers from his hangover the following morning, she will deposit the proceeds in their bank account.

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