Chemistry (relationship)

In the context of relationships, chemistry is a simple "emotion" that two people get when they share a special connection. It is not necessarily sexual. It is the impulse making one think "I need to see this [other] person again" - that feeling of "we click". It is very early in one's relationship that they can intuitively work out whether they have positive or negative chemistry.

While the actual definition of chemistry, its components, and its manifestations are fairly vague, this is a well documented concept. Some people describe chemistry in metaphorical terms, such as "like cookie dough and vanilla ice cream", or "like a performance". It can be described in the terms of mutual feelings - "a connection, a bond or common feeling between two people", or as a chemical process - "[it] stimulates love or sexual attraction...brain chemicals are definitely involved". While chemistry has been described as "that romantic spark between [two people]", the term "spark" in the context of relationships is as vague as "chemistry", and therefore is not particularly useful in a definition. It has also been described as "intangible, unspoken [and] energetic". Chemistry is an unconscious decision, informed by a complex blend of criteria.

Some of the core components of chemistry are: "non-judgment, similarity, mystery, attraction, mutual trust, and effortless communication" Chemistry can be described as the combination of "love, lust, infatuation, and a desire to be involved intimately with someone".

Research by Kelly Campbell, Ph.D., suggests that "not everyone experiences chemistry". She decided that "chemistry occurred most often between people who are down-to-earth and sincere". This is because "if a person is comfortable with themselves, they are better able to express their true self to the world, which makes it easier to get to know them...even if perspectives on important matters differed." Sharing similarities is also deemed essential to chemistry as "feeling understood is essential to forming relational bonds."

In general terms, there are 3 main types of chemistry, which are defined in terms of the nature of the rapport between the respective people:

The various manifestations of chemistry are: sexual chemistry, romantic chemistry, emotional chemistry, activity chemistry, team performance chemistry, creative chemistry, intellectual chemistry, and empowerment chemistry".

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